What is somatic conflict coaching?
Somatic conflict coaching is all about supporting you to engage differently in conflict. Many of us struggle with conflict: we avoid it, hide from it, pretend it's not there - or we move towards it, seek confrontation, try to be right at all costs - in short, we often don't show up as our best selves when things get tense. And that makes sense: the way we're hard wired supports these kinds of reactions, and many of us didn't grow up with examples of how to handle things differently. In fact, still, today: when we turn on the TV it's rare that conflict is engaged with generatively instead of destructively. It can be hard to even image that things could be different.
The good news is: it is possible. Things could be different. I'm not saying it'll be an enjoyable day out in the park. It takes practice, and support, to shift those entrenched patterns of reaction. And: it'll be worth it. Investing in navigating conflict beforehand can really reduce the time, energy and mental load of dealing with it after the fact.
With somatic conflict coaching I invite you into an exploration: where are you at? What do you need? What are your patterns? And how would you like things to be different?
Somatic conflict coaching can help you:
- connect to your values and how you'd like to be in the world
- recognise patterns and situations that make being the way you'd like to difficult
- explore what's needed to shift those patterns and situations
- develop the tools and practices to create those shifts
- celebrate what is working for you
Some of the things we might work on:
- knowing and expressing what you are sensing, feeling and needing
- sensing and expressing your boundaries
- navigating emotions that you find difficult to be with
- finding practical tools to support you in difficult moments and how they fit into your life
- creating moments of self-connection, joy and gratitude to support your overall wellbeing and charging your inner battery
- recognising what in your environment gives you energy and what is draining for you
- practising being in a difficult situation or conversation that you're faced with or anticipating being in
Somatic conflict coaching can help you navigate a particular situation you're faced with (i.e. an on-going argument with your partner, a difficult conversation coming up at work, a conflict in your friend group that you're witnessing). It can also help you generally be better at conflict, by strengthening core skills and helping you put practices and systems into place for when you really need them.
Why am I offering this?
I have been in extremely painful conflict. I have witnesssed extremely painful conflict. And I have supported people through extremely painful conflict, through my work as a mediator. Again and again the same patterns occur. Again and again not enough support is available. Again and again things that started of relatively small have turned into huge rifts. I have learned the hard way what's needed to be in these kinds of situations, and I really want to create a supportive environment for others to do the same. I strongly believe that for many people what's missing is conflict literacy - some understanding of what might be needed in conflict and the skills and practices that support a generative approach to conflict.
Through my training as a certified Resilience Toolkit facilitator, I've also come to understand how ingrained our responses are - and that most of the time, we can't think or rationalise our way out of our responses. We need to include all of ourselves, including our soma, our body, along with our thoughts and feelings. That's why my approach to this work is rooted in somatics.
I'm interested - what's a next step?
Get in touch and we'll have an initial conversation about your situation and what you might be needing. Then we'll both take a few days to feel into whether this is a right fit.
What does this cost?
Somatic conflict coaching, as with most of my work, is offered in the spirit of pay-what-you-can. To learn more about this approach and to support what might be the right amount for you, please see this page.
Where do you work?
I work online and from 2025 I also have a space available in Enschede (the Netherlands) where I can host sessions.
The good news is: it is possible. Things could be different. I'm not saying it'll be an enjoyable day out in the park. It takes practice, and support, to shift those entrenched patterns of reaction. And: it'll be worth it. Investing in navigating conflict beforehand can really reduce the time, energy and mental load of dealing with it after the fact.
With somatic conflict coaching I invite you into an exploration: where are you at? What do you need? What are your patterns? And how would you like things to be different?
Somatic conflict coaching can help you:
- connect to your values and how you'd like to be in the world
- recognise patterns and situations that make being the way you'd like to difficult
- explore what's needed to shift those patterns and situations
- develop the tools and practices to create those shifts
- celebrate what is working for you
Some of the things we might work on:
- knowing and expressing what you are sensing, feeling and needing
- sensing and expressing your boundaries
- navigating emotions that you find difficult to be with
- finding practical tools to support you in difficult moments and how they fit into your life
- creating moments of self-connection, joy and gratitude to support your overall wellbeing and charging your inner battery
- recognising what in your environment gives you energy and what is draining for you
- practising being in a difficult situation or conversation that you're faced with or anticipating being in
Somatic conflict coaching can help you navigate a particular situation you're faced with (i.e. an on-going argument with your partner, a difficult conversation coming up at work, a conflict in your friend group that you're witnessing). It can also help you generally be better at conflict, by strengthening core skills and helping you put practices and systems into place for when you really need them.
Why am I offering this?
I have been in extremely painful conflict. I have witnesssed extremely painful conflict. And I have supported people through extremely painful conflict, through my work as a mediator. Again and again the same patterns occur. Again and again not enough support is available. Again and again things that started of relatively small have turned into huge rifts. I have learned the hard way what's needed to be in these kinds of situations, and I really want to create a supportive environment for others to do the same. I strongly believe that for many people what's missing is conflict literacy - some understanding of what might be needed in conflict and the skills and practices that support a generative approach to conflict.
Through my training as a certified Resilience Toolkit facilitator, I've also come to understand how ingrained our responses are - and that most of the time, we can't think or rationalise our way out of our responses. We need to include all of ourselves, including our soma, our body, along with our thoughts and feelings. That's why my approach to this work is rooted in somatics.
I'm interested - what's a next step?
Get in touch and we'll have an initial conversation about your situation and what you might be needing. Then we'll both take a few days to feel into whether this is a right fit.
What does this cost?
Somatic conflict coaching, as with most of my work, is offered in the spirit of pay-what-you-can. To learn more about this approach and to support what might be the right amount for you, please see this page.
Where do you work?
I work online and from 2025 I also have a space available in Enschede (the Netherlands) where I can host sessions.
